Finding my gate and sitting down and looking out the huge windows i cant believe that im actually going to see my ian. Im trying not to let little things that people are doing around me get to me. Im trying to be in the most optimistic mood possible even with being so anxious that i havent held solid food down since sunday. And that i am exhausted and its way past my sleep time so now the my body is starting to ache. Its starting to rebel with a headache and is moving into my back and arm. Why did i have to have scoliosis and flippin nerve damage? Ugh! Guess i wont be jumping on ian when i see him. I just hope it doesnt get to the point where i have to ask for a wheelchair. Now that would suck!!! Wish me luck!
I am a nervous wreck flying... completely anxious and out of my mind. My body controls my brain who apparently is already past the point of insanity. So it doesn't help that I am stuck in a tiny ass plane with God knows how many strangers and smells and my claustrophobia sets in like no other. Im one of those people who you can tell just by looking at them they don't want to be on a plane. And since I haven't seen Ian in over a year my anxiety was at an all time high. As we touched down in Ontario not only was I scared shitless (as i am every time a take off or landing happens) but I started crying because this overwhelming happiness came over me. I just said out loud "Im gonna see my Ian. I'm gonna see my Ian." over and over again until the plane stopped. When I got off the plane i text Ian saying "Im here." and his reply was "So am I." and my heart about leaped out of my chest. Going down the escalators looking for him I started getting worried when I didnt see him. But I happened to look at the right time and there he was, I held back tears as I clung on to him. Knowing that I'd be alright now cuz he was there.
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